Good Artists Steal
by The Secret Miracle
Summary: A coda to Under the Table and Dreaming, set over the course of the following year. Eames and Arthur learn to live with each other.


**Coda to Under the Table and Dreaming: Good Artists Steal**

**August**

Eames and Arthur spend the whole month learning to live with each other, which is more than enough of an occupation. For example, Arthur discovers, unsurprisingly really, that Eames loves to roam the house in the nude and that he is an amazing cook.

The first time Arthur truly thinks of the house in Vernazza as his home is when he orders a new bed for it, a large one with a hard mattress that will be good for Eames's back.

**September**

Arthur takes his first job since inception, just a short one in Rome. Eames has a bottle of champagne waiting for him when he gets back after a weekend away, bitching about his neighbor on the train with halitosis.

**October**

They both leave for jobs for most of October, but Eames calls him home on the second Monday in order to celebrate Thanksgiving.

"This is Canadian Thanksgiving," Arthur points out over dinner. "American Thanksgiving is in November."

But he has to admit the pumpkin pie is worth it.

**November**

Arthur comes home from his first long job to find a folder on the kitchen table. Inside is the deed to the house and Eames has a left a sticky note where he needs to sign, embossed with a question mark.

Arthur signs without thinking about it too much and then goes out to buy more blankets. It's getting cold in Vernazza and he doesn't think the house has been adequately winterized.

**December-February**

Eames dislikes the cold even more than Arthur, and so they spend the winter months with an island as their home base. Saito owns it, and he drops in occasionally.

Eames gets a suntan with no lines at all while Arthur collects many bottles of suntan lotion.

**March**

Arthur comes home to find the kitchen a war zone. He discovers this by running into something in the dark and when, cursing, he turns on the light, he is greeted by the sight of drop cloths, ladders, buckets and all the appliances detached from the walls, rendering them useless.

He tramps up the stairs finds a note from Eames on his pillow.

_Arthur darling,_

_I've decided to redo the kitchen. Sorry for any inconvienence. I've got everything under control, don't worry, exsept I'm afraid you won't be able to cook anything._

_Love,_

_Eames_

The painter's name turns out to be Salvatore. He is a chain smoker and refuses to tell Arthur what the kitchen will look like when he's done, under the pretext of not understanding English.

Arthur leaves early the next morning for an impromptu job in Johannesburg after first correcting Eames's spelling mistakes and writing a response.

_Dear Eames,_

_Does it take a long time to find employees who are hygienically-impaired, not to mention exceedingly likely to make off with my favorite grandfather clock, or does it come naturally?_

_Arthur_

**April**

Arthur doesn't go back to Italy for all of April in order to give Salvatore as much time as possible to finish whatever horrible thing he is doing to his kitchen. He works on a long job involving a lot of research in London, but if he happens to make a couple trips to a certain forger's hotel room in Paris, that's nobody's business but theirs.

**May**

Arthur tries to go home in May, but Salvatore is still occupying his kitchen. The walls are now a bright shade called Mango Green (Arthur checked the paint can and then ran it through an online translator), and he thinks he might go blind.

There's another note from Eames on his pillow.

_Arthur love,_

_If you could have anything in the entire world, what would it be?(Besides me, obviously.)_

_Yours forever,_

_Eames_

Arthur rolls his eyes and scrawls a sarcastic answer.

In retaliation for the kitchen, Arthur goes to Cairo where he meets up with Yusuf and spends a week having beautifully carved wooden furniture and thick, Oriental rugs shipped to Italy.

**June**

There is an art theft in June that has the entire world talking, but Arthur remains oblivious, locked away in a basement apartment in Sydney doing a vast amount of research for his current job.

He gets a surprise visit in the middle of the month, which sets him behind in his work by a good week, but he can't really manage to care.

**July**

At the end of the month, when he's doing a quick job in New York, Arthur gets a series of phone calls from Ariadne. He forces himself to be sociable and actually answer them instead of letting his phone go to voicemail. They talk about what they've been up to, some of the major events in the world.

"So what are you and Eames doing for your anniversary?" she asks after informing a shocked Arthur that the Mona Lisa has been stolen.

"Anniversary?" he asks, honestly confused.

"Um, yeah," Ariadne says. "You finally got your act together last August."

"But that hardly means…" Arthur trails off. Somehow it has never occurred to him that he is in an actual relationship, and that means things like anniversaries.

"Well, Eames is getting pretty excited about it," Ariadne offers. "He keeps trying to make me guess what he got you, and—"

"Shit," he says, and Ariadne laughs.

He hangs up on her when she starts debating what kind of sexual favors he'll be granting Eames in lieu of the gift he has clearly forgotten to buy.

**August**

Arthur's flight was delayed into Genoa and he is tired and anxious to be home. He suffers through another interminable train ride to Vernazza, made all the more uncomfortable by the large garment bag he refuses to relinquish to the luggage rack. He thinks darkly that he is cursed to always sit next to the most loquacious passengers and pretends not to know Italian or English.

He walks briskly through the town to the house perched on the cliff. It looks like a start has been made on repainting the outer walls. He can't quite tell in the dim lighting, but it might be turquoise.

The kitchen, at least, has finally been finished and it is truly a sight to behold. All the appliances have been replaced with shiny new ones and the garish walls are accented with orange tiles. The table is set with brightly painted pottery from Siena with a rooster motif, but the food is cold.

Arthur curses and hurtles up the narrow staircase, pausing at the living room just long enough to note how well the furniture he bought in Cairo looks, although he's pretty sure he didn't buy the painting of the zebra against a dark blue background.

In their bedroom, Eames has fallen asleep, fully dressed, on top of the covers and using Arthur's pillow. Arthur quietly drapes the garment bag across the armchair and crawls onto the bed next to the sprawling figure. He fits himself against Eames's chest and presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

"Sorry I'm late," he says, and Eames's eyes flutter open. "The plane…"

"Happy anniversary," Eames says, smiling and wrapping his arms around Arthur.

"Happy anniversary," Arthur echoes, trying to reign in his own silly smile.

Eames nods to the wall opposite. "Do you like your gift?"

Arthur half sits and for the first time notices the small painting hanging on the wall across from the bed.

He stares. He looks down at Eames who is all cat-like smugness.

"You can't _steal_ my present," he begins to protest, but Eames chooses the classic method of using his own mouth to shut up Arthur's.

Arthur is interested in continuing their kiss to its natural conclusion, but Eames jumps off the bed saying, "My turn!" and rips open the garment bag like a little kid at his birthday party. He shoots a huge smile at Arthur and immediately divests himself of the tired jacket and rumpled shirt he is wearing in order to try it on.

The suit is a tailored Armani three-piece with purple paisley lining and a matching tie. Arthur secretly loves it but he will never tell. Eames struts towards him and he laughs then goes to work on taking him right out of the suit again.


End file.
